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The Journal of the Lincoln Heights Literary Society
Miscellanea and Ephemeron

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10/04/2005 Archived Entry: "Book review: The NYC Cab Driver's Book of Dirty Jokes"

The New York City Cab Driver's Book of Dirty Jokes
by Jim Pietsch
published by Warner Books, 2005

Review by Ida Vega-Landow

First of all, I'm a native New Yorker, so you know dirty jokes don't offend me. Secondly, I miss the old days when New York City cabs were driven mostly by local boys from Brooklyn, who smoked cigars and talked like Archie Bunker, and who liked talking to their passengers and telling them jokes, the same way the author of this little tome did. Jim Peitsch is a former NYC cab driver who's already written two previous collections of jokes he's heard and told during his career (The New York City Cab Driver's Joke Book, Volumes 1 and 2). I'm just sorry I missed them, because I enjoyed this book so much. Even though I have heard many of them already, thanks to my favorite radio station, WAXQ-FM, where the morning DJ, Jim Kerr, has a sidekick named Shelli Sonstein who loves dirty jokes so much, she has a Monday morning feature called The Dirty Joke of The Week, in which she tells dirty jokes that were submitted to her via e-mail by the morning show's listeners. (I've submitted three jokes to her myself, but I've yet to hear any of them on the air.)

Even rehashes of familiar jokes sound good the way that Jim Pietsch tells them, like the one about the cursing parrot who's put in the same cage with two praying parrots to see if they'll be a good influence on her. There's even a mild version of The Aristocrats, the granddaddy of all dirty jokes, which everybody has probably seen the movie version of by now. (BTW, I read a really raw version of The Aristocrats as told by Data of "Star Trek: The Next Generation", written by a fellow Star Trek fan. Space and good taste forbids me from repeating it here. But take it from me, it's filthy and funny!)

There's also a plethora of blonde jokes, all perpetuating the stereotype about the limited intelligence of blondes, such as:

Q: What is the mating call of a blonde?
A: "Boy, am I drunk!"

Q: What is the mating call of a brunette?
A: "Has that drunk blonde left yet?"

Q: How can you get a blonde to marry you?
A: Tell her she's pregnant.

Q: What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A: Puts on her clothes and goes home.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a parrot?
A: A parrot can say "no".

I'd better quit before I'm accused of prejudice against blondes. I assure you that I have no bias whatsoever against blondes, no matter how much taller and thinner than me they are. I also have nothing against gays, but I really liked the gay jokes, among them:

Q: Did you hear about the gay midget?
A: He came out of the cupboard.

Q: What is the politically correct name for "Lesbian"?
A: A Vagitarian.

Q: What's the best thing about being gay?
A: After sex, you have someone intelligent to talk to.

The above joke can be interpreted liberally to mean that if you're gay, you consider all other gays to be more intelligent than straights. Or it could be interpreted narrowly to mean that you're a woman-hater, if you're a man, or a man-hater, if you're a woman. There's something for everyone in this book! Even some lawyer jokes that I never heard before, such as:

Q: What happens when a lawyer takes Viagra?
A: He gets taller.

Q: What does a lawyer use for birth control?
A: His personality.

You just have to buy this book to experience the sassy humor of a New York City cab driver for yourself. I warn you, he doesn't pull any punches or spare any ethic or religious groups, so if you're a devout Catholic you're bound to be offended by the child-molesting priest jokes. Likewise, if you're a devout Jew you're sure to be offended by the cheap Jewish jokes. But that's the way that humor is supposed to be; politically incorrect, sparing nothing and nobody! Remember, true humor consists of being able to laugh at yourself, as well as at others. So if you're offended by anything you read in The NYC Cab Driver's Book of Dirty Jokes, just keep reading and you're sure to find something worse about a particular group that you dislike. Which reminds me:

Q: Why did God create Lesbians?
A: So feminists couldn't breed.

You see? Now, as a Feminist, I personally find that joke offensive. But I can see the humor in it, especially when I found several about men that are equally vicious, like:

Q: What's the difference between a penis and a prick?
A: A penis is the male sex organ, and a prick is someone who owns one.

Okay, I ain't giving away any more freebies! Buy this book and you're sure to be the center of attention at any party after a few drinks, in New York City or anyplace else.

Replies: 2 comments

you might be intered in Shelli's classic dirty joke book- published in 1984- available on the web for about $5 if you punch in shelli sonstein

Posted by andrew rubin @ 12/16/2005 03:22 PM PST

freakin awsome jokes :>

Posted by gmoney @ 01/23/2006 12:58 PM PST

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